We normally don't do this kind of thing - the kind of thing he once did so well - but we can't help ourselves.
A Taxonomy of Losers. The NY Times gives a full page to the guys who can't get dates, assigning them some sort of sociological importance. (Which, we suppose, is still marginally better than Sam Tanenhaus giving himself four full pages of the Book Review to argue down Hofstadter nearly forty years later. But others are sure to weigh in on that one.)