Are we getting soft in our dotage? Perhaps it's this odd confluence of personal circumstance that our therapist describes as "happiness" but we're oddly unable to work up much of a lather over the mediocrity that is this week's Book Review. Sure, it's not without its outrages, Eugen Weber reliably among them. And he's hardly alone - leaden notes drop with abandon this week. But there's an odd absence of spittle at the corner of our mouths and we feel more and more like Salieri grinning sublimely at the end of Amadeus, gleefully absolving the world's mediocrities. On to the grades:
STATS
Full length fiction reviews: 3 Things are looking somewhat better on this front, it can't be argued.
Total fiction reviews: 7. This includes the above-referenced 4-in-1 Weber monstrosity.
Full length non-fiction reviews: 4.
Total non-fiction reviews: 5.
Columns: Discoveries
And what, we can't help but wonder, has become of the First Fiction column?
TITLES, AUTHORS & REVIEWERS
Dangerous Games by John Shannon. Reviewed by Dick Lochte Grade: B+
Conduct Under Fire by John A. Glusman. Reviewed by Claire Panosian Dunavan Grade: C+
Runaway Waltz by Frederic Morton. Reviewed by Wendy Smith Grade: D
Son of the Rough South by Karl Fleming. Reviewed by David J. Garrow. Grade: C+
The Chairman by Stephen Frey; Prince of Fire by Daniel Silva; Cold Service by Robert B, Parker; and Drama City by George Pelecanos. Reviewed by Eugen Weber. Grade: F
Until I Find You by John Irving. Reviewed by Heller McAlpin. Grade: B-
William Empson by John Haffenden. Reviewed by Miranda Seymour. Grade: A
A Matter of Opinion by Victor S. Navasky. Reviewed by James D. Squires. Grade: D
The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells. Reviewed by Gavin J. Grant. Grade: D+
Envy by Kathryn Harrison. Reviewed by Jane Ciabattari. D
Discoveries Column: Scenes from a Receding Past by Aldan Higgins; The Devil's Pool by Goerge Sand; and Teaching the Trees by Joan Maloof. Reviewed by Susan Salter Reynolds. Grade: B-
WHAT WE LIKE ...
The review of the Empson biography is surely this issue's highlight ... an intelligent, erudite look at a volume worthy of our attention - almost too good to have run here .... We're pretty sure most of you seldom click through the links and read the reviews themselves, but we urge you to take five and read this one, even if it means blowing off the rest of our twaddle ... We're pleased that John Shannon's latest Jack Liffey novel got some prominent love (although you did read it here first) ... We're not remotely interested in the fictional offerings of John Irving but we concede he probably must be reviewed, and McAlpin takes on Irving in an admirably straight and tough fashion ... But that's more or less it this time around ... although, despite our exsaperation with this irritating movie tie-in impulse, we were surprised and excited to learn that Edward Gorey had illustrated a version of War of the Worlds (which is the only thing that kept that review from an F.)
WHAT WE DON'T ...
Picking on Eugen Weber is kind of like making jokes about Dubya's intelligence ... at this point it's just so easy that the fun has more or less gone out of it altogether ... We'll content ourselves to suggest that Weber's latest reads not so much like it was written, but rather that the old boy merely unzipped his fly and began to contemptuously slap his johnson across the keyboard for 600 words ... He must be stopped ... The review of the Glusman was moderately interesting but - yet again, in the fashion of Important Non Fiction Review - way too long, hence its C+ grade ... Conversely, the review of the Fleming memoir deserved more room, starting strong and then fading into jarring disjointedness ... The review of the Morton book is a disaster, which is a shame because it seems an interesting title ... but what to make of infelicities like "10 chapters capture paradigmatic incidents from 1936 to 1994" and such profound insights are "Morton applies fictional techniques to real-life events, revealing complex emotions through actions and sensitively analyzing motivations" ... Welcome to Fiction 101, class is in session ... The Harrison novel sounds just wretched (we're not fans) and gets, one supposes, appropriately overwrought handling - "shattering series of scenes" and the like ... and the Navasky memoir deserved better than this sort of foolishness:
You may indeed think so if you are Navasky's "ideal reader," the one for whom he writes — a habit he has indulged with great success in editing the magazine and did not break for this memoir.
Um, can anyone out there tell us what the fuck exactly the means? We thought that writing for one's ideal reader was more or less a given. But what do we know - our ideal reader struggles with fortune cookies, and how's that for setting the bar low ...
GRADE: C- Setting the bar low seems to be the first order of business at the Times these days. If beautiful bike rides and companionable new friends keep competing for our Sundays, we're not sure how much longer we can keep this up ...
I have taken you at your word and gone off to read the Empson review, only because I don't normally read this thumbnail, not getting the ole LATBR down under and all, and because the Empson bio was reviewed down here a few weeks back. Makes one want to buy, yes?? or at least to bother the library over. (And to pull out Seven Types and actually finish it too - I think I've only read two chapters).
Posted by: genevieve | July 12, 2005 at 05:09 AM
Brain. Hurts. Weber. Must. Be. Stopped.
Posted by: Jim Ruland | July 12, 2005 at 10:27 AM
I'm wondering if the johnson-slapping will work with my Moleskine...or Foreskine...
Posted by: Jimmy Beck | July 12, 2005 at 10:30 AM
Hell, I love Kathryn Harrison (although not THE KISS, her novels). Enjoying ENVY as of this very moment. Just wanted to say that.
And: keyboard. Johnson. Slapping. In my freaking head for the rest of the day. Um, thanks for that.
Posted by: Justine | July 12, 2005 at 11:04 AM
Mark,
Possibly the best put-down of any book reviewer I've ever read. Thanks, my keyboard will never look the same.
Posted by: Keith | July 13, 2005 at 09:12 AM