Baby's first Christmas is upon us here at Chez TEV, so I'm shuttering the site until the new year. Look for signs of life here around January 13, when I'm back from my Paris trip. (I do have a very interesting book review set to run in the interim, and I will pop back to alert you to check it out.)
It's been a real challenge to keep things going here in the shadow of diapers, feedings and the rest, but I remain committed to keeping things interesting and lively. I'm grateful to have such thoughtful, witty and dedicated readers, and I'll be refocusing in the new year, and even bringing in some help to manage the load.
Until then, I wanted to share my latest enthusiasm with you all. Jamie Byng, my UK publisher, recently sent me a copy of Davd Eagleman's Sum as a holiday gift. I admired Jamie's taste long before he acquired my novel (Canongate's Myth series is one of the best efforts of its kind, I think), and since the book was slim - a key factor for me these days - I jumped in.
Sum presents forty different views of what the afterlife might look like. It's charming, a bit whimsical, and thought-provoking. It puts me in mind of Alan Lightman's Einstein's Dreams. (It's not insignificant that Eagleman is a scientist.) With Canongate's kind permission, I present the first afterlife in its brief entirety to send you off for the holidays. I hope you enjoy it, and look forward to seeing you all back here in the new year, when all sorts of mischief will ensue.
- SUM -
In the afterlife you relive all your experiences, but this time with the events reshuffled into a new order: all the moments that share a quality are grouped together.
You spend two months driving the street in front of your house, seven months having sex. You sleep for thirty years without opening your eyes. For five months straight you flip through magazines while sitting on a toilet.
You take all your pain at once, all twenty-seven intense hours of it. Bones break, cars crash, skin is cut, babies are born. Once you make it through, it’s agony-free for the rest of your afterlife.
But that doesn’t mean it’s always pleasant. You spend six days clipping your nails. Fifteen months looking for lost items. Eighteen months waiting in line. Two years of boredom: staring out a bus window, sitting in an airport terminal. One year reading books. Your eyes hurt, and you itch, because you can’t take a shower until it’s your time to take your marathon two-hundred-day shower. Two weeks wondering what happens when you die. One minute realizing your body is falling. Seventy-seven hours of confusion. One hour realizing you’ve forgotten someone’s name. Three weeks realizing you are wrong. Two days lying. Six weeks waiting for a green light. Seven hours vomiting. Fourteen minutes experiencing pure joy. Three months doing laundry. Fifteen hours writing your signature. Two days tying shoelaces. Sixty-seven days of heartbreak. Five weeks driving lost. Three days calculating restaurant tips. Fifty-one days deciding what to wear. Nine days pretending you know what is being talked about. Two weeks counting money. Eighteen days staring into the refrigerator. Thirty-four days longing. Six months watching commercials. Four weeks sitting in thought, wondering if there is something better you could be doing with your time. Three years swallowing food. Five days working buttons and zippers. Four minutes wondering what your life would be like if you reshuffled the order of events. In this part of the afterlife, you imagine something analogous to your Earthly life, and the thought is blissful: a life where episodes are split into tiny swallowable pieces, where moments do not endure, where one experiences the joy of jumping from one event to the next like a child hopping from spot to spot on the burning sand.
Also good: the radio version.
Posted by: Peter Robins | December 23, 2009 at 10:10 AM
What a great example of differences between covers of the same book published in USA and Great Britain. In the case of this book the British cover is way better.
Posted by: Grant | December 23, 2009 at 07:16 PM
I bought 10 or 15 copies of Sum, can't remember for sure, and gave them away to friends. Simply a fun (and no one should belittle fun) great creative read. Excited to see you giving it a good mention.
Posted by: Valerie | January 06, 2010 at 11:14 PM
Thank you so much for this recommendation---I was unaware of this book (almost a booklet) and bought it on the strength of your excerpt. I'm trying to read it slowly instead of gulping as I usually do, and enjoying it very much. I agree with Grant's comment, the US cover is not as good as the British one (but what good blurbs: Brian Eno, Geoff Dyer, and Stephen Fry!)
Posted by: Marianne | January 14, 2010 at 11:08 AM